Comments on: The Texas Dildo Massacre, or, Reason Number 2,767 Why Gay Rights Matter To Everyone

by: C. L. Hanson

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 12:49:31 +0000

I agree that privacy for some is privacy for all. As I said in my second gay discrimination post (why? why? why? II), for every sexual expression that one person finds arousing, I can guarantee you 100% that there exists another human that finds the same exact scene repulsive and disgusting. So let’s agree to stay out of the bedrooms of other consenting adults if we’re not invited and don’t like what we see there.

I also agree that this ought to extend to protections for sex workers. I just wrote a general article about prejudice against female sexual expression, and naturally sex work came up in the comments — these things are all related.

by: Carrie Lynne

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 18:23:09 +0000

ooops! Re-reading my entry I made a huge typo! Please allow to me correct it… “My discussions do not include the use of the terms ‘boyfriend or girlfriend’ and I told them that I would (definitely should have stressed that I will NOT) present a biased viewpoint. Thanks!!!

by: Carrie Lynne

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 18:18:59 +0000

Bravo… I am a sexual health educator struggling to establish myself in small-town, Republican, racist, anti-choice, homophobic California. This is no easy feat and even the notion of providing condoms, much less unbiased, comprehensive sex education to the youth in this community has been met with opposition! In a recent proposal made to the tribal service providers I asked about the population of LGBT youth in the community and they acted as though I asked how many of them had two heads! I was asked not to mention same-sex relationships in my presentation as though discussing it would only encourage them. My discussions do not include the use of the terms ‘boyfriend or girlfriend’ and I told them that I would present a biased viewpoint. I stressed that youth who feel oppressed due their sexual orientation and identity are more likely to be self destructive, the biggest concern they have for the tribal youth. The response was that they will discuss it and get back to me. I know two of the women on the panel personally and they have been a couple since highschool! I also know (thanks to my searches through Adult Friend Finder) that the neighboring small town has more swingers parties than the big city in Canada that I just returned from! The denial and shame associated with sex in general, and homosexuality specifically, in this valley is appalling, and sadly not isolated to only my small town America. The Texas decision is fantastic news and if those rednecks will finally allow their fellow citizens the right to get off in what ever way tickles their fancy, then there just may be hope for the rest of us. I love Dan Savage’s opinions and it is through folks like him, and you, and hopefully me, that we will make a difference one red-neck, broke-back cowboy at a time!

by: omnivore

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 11:26:33 +0000

I believe it was Feministing that recently posted a clip called “The Dildo Diaries” that explained the sort of verbal somersaults necessary to purchase ~~a dildo~~ an educational model in Texas. I found it highly amusing (Go Molly Ivins!) and at the same time deeply disturbing. There are plenty of conservatives up here in the Northeast, just as I know there are plenty of liberals down there in Texas. We just do things in a different style.

Thank you for pointing out the important triumph for civil liberties and privacy that goes along with this ruling. In this day and age of warrantless wiretapping and national security paranoia, it’s good to know that some of our civil rights are being strengthened rather than eroded.

I would like to comment on one concept that you appear to take for granted, however: the dichotomous notion of “gay” and “straight.” In my experience (which is not unsubstantial), I find that human sexuality is much too fluid to fit into these two boxes. Where do bisexuals fall in these categories? What about a female/female couple that never engages in oral sex but instead practices tribadism and manual sex? What about a male/female couple in which the woman bends over her boyfriend? Where does kink fall on this continuum? Or does it? What, exactly, constitutes gay vs straight sex?

I’m not saying that I have the answers to these questions. It’s a bit like asking where poetry ends and prose begins; the more you investigate it, the more the lines blur. Rather, I invite you to challenge the notion that a boundary exists at all.