The Blowfish Blog

Sexnology

By science! Since this column is only available due to technology — the Internet, ubiquitous personal computers, and so forth — it’s only natural that I take an interest in the intersection of science and sex. A couple of choice examples:

Research is your friend. Live Science has examined some prevalent penis myths. It turns out: women don’t care how long it is, dude. If they care at all, they care about width. Penis size doesn’t vary with race. Penis-enlargement technlogy mostly doesn’t work, but it can provide a “psychologically uplifting” effect, so go crazy. (Actually, if you can get a Brazilian poisonous snake to bite your cock, the venom will make it swell significantly for up to six months. Book your plane tickets now!) And, what you’re surely most interested in, the real average size for erect penises: “5.5 to 6.2 inches long and about 4.7 to 5.1 inches in circumference.” Go ahead. Get out your tape measures. I’ll wait.

In non-penis-related technology news . . . The online world was shaken — shaken to its core — by the startling revelation that self-described geeks who work on computers for a living also like porn, and aren’t above stealing it from hapless customers. The saga began with a long confession by a former member of the Geek Squad — you know, the roving on-call computer techs who work for Best Buy — about the nefarious porn-stealing propensities of his brethren. (Along with various other shady activities on the part of Best Buy.) Read the whole piece here. A little taste: “If there were a competition between a Playboy editor, a photo lab technician, and a voyeur for the person who has seen the most random pictures of naked people . . . the only way any of them would win is if the Geek Squad agent was late to the contest.” Yeah, that’s right. They’re in ur computerz, lookin at ur nekkid girlfriend.

The Consumerist decided to see if that essay still reflected current reality. They rigged up a PC to make a movie of its own screen and brought in a Geek Squad guy to install iTunes on the computer. He did install iTunes . . . and he also snooped through folders and stole the choice bits of porn. Check out the video here. Now, if you’re reading this, I’m going to hazard a guess that, just maybe, you have some porn on your computer — so you might want to lock that stuff down with a password before you take your computer in for repair. It’s not just Geek Squad — any tech might be tempted. It’s human nature to snoop, after all, so unless you want the guy replacing your computer’s power supply to discover your fetish for latex ponygirl ageplay watersports or whatever, take care.

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, 18 July 2007 at 2:57 pm and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.