The Blowfish Blog

Caught in the Net: You’re Sexy When I’m Drunk

Last week I discussed some recent intersections of science and sexuality, and this week I revisit the same topic, with a bit more . . . eclecticism. First up, some scientific proof to back up all that anecdotal evidence that intense sexual attraction only lasts a couple of years. Researchers at the University of Pisa in Italy studied hormone levels in couples in the fresh bloom of new love, and in couples who’ve been together for a long time . . . and discovered very different hormones at work. After a year or two, the “love molecules” that make the early stages of the relationship so sexually intense begin to wane, and are replaced by our old friend oxytocin — the “cuddle hormone” — which makes you want to snuggle more than you want to, say, screw against the wall of a freight elevator on your lunch break. The scientists in the article are afraid that some chemist might attempt to create an artificial form of the lust hormone, a real-life cupid’s arrow, to which I can only reply, “Well, duh, of course someone will!” Working love potions (or, at least, lust potions), here we come!

But don’t despair, men, if you feel the old sparkle starting to fade. The solution is to drink more! Turns out that daily alcohol consumption can increase your sex drive and decrease your sexual inhibitions. (Er, though, the scientists have actually only proven this with fruit flies. And most men of drinking-and-shagging age know that too much of the former can sometimes make the latter physiologically difficult . . .)

Enough about humans. Let’s move on to animals . . . behaving like humans! Like this astonishing photograph of gorillas having sex in the missionary position. It’s the first time this position has been observed in this particular kind of gorilla, and the first time it’s ever been photographed in the wild. (The female of the couple is also the first gorilla ever seen using tools in the wild, which makes me suspect she’s come kind of awesome sexually-adventurous gorilla genius — will it be long before she figures out how to improvise a vibrator using a beehive and a stick?)

Humans having sex is good, and animals having sex is good, but humans having sex with animals is . . .. less than good. In so many ways. One way it’s bad: letting a boar have anal sex with you can tear you up inside, so if you were contemplating such a thing, reconsider. Turns out a pig’s tail isn’t the only part of its anatomy shaped like a corkscrew — they’ve got decidedly strange penises, too. You don’t want to be like the poor Bulgarian farmer in that article, making sweet love to bacon-on-the-hoof and suffering rectal tears as a result. You can read a PDF of the original paper, which is titled, “Zoophilia: a rare case of traumatic injury to the rectum”  . . . though I’d totally understand if you don’t want to.

Share This

This entry was posted on Wednesday, 26 March 2008 at 12:00 pm and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.