[Caught in the Net] Wholesome Porn
Now, don’t get me wrong — I’m all about gratuitous nudity and explicit sex. Few things make me happier. But there’s something to be said for the tease, and for subverting the expectations of a porn-jaded audience, and I bring you a few such enjoyable examples.
Consider the strange and amusing wonder of PG Porn from director James Gunn, which combines some of my favorite porn stars (like Belladonna and Sasha Grey and Roxy DeVille) and beloved actors (like Nathan Fillion and Alan Tudyk!) for short films that include all the qualities of porno . . . except for the sex. There’s bad acting, bad dialogue, and highly creative avoidance of the seemingly-inevitable sex.
Boob-happy tabloid Zoo has a great feature called “Strip, Please” (formerly called “Sex-Ray Specs”). The setup is pure genius: gorgeous models are photographed, fully glothed, doing some mundane task — ironing, gardening, getting ready for a night on the town — and are then photographed again, with the scene exactly the same, except they’re topless (and down to underwear otherwise). Enjoy, you nude housework fetishists! The series uses the power of art to charge everyday situations with erotic power! Also: yay, boobies!
What could be more wholesome than the Bible? (Which is, of course, a book full of war, slavery, massacre, genocide . . . but I’m getting distracted from my point.) Of course, there were still slammin’ hotties — to use the vernacular of our times — in the days of the Bible, and better yet, many of those Biblical women have been depicted on screen and elsewhere by hot modern ladies. Hence, the top 10 hottest babes of the Bible. “They liked to drink wine, many of them were into sexual immorality and they were topless all the time.” They make a good case!
How do wholesome people feel about porn? It stands to reason that people who oppose pornography wouldn’t look at it, let along pay money to see it . . . But a study released earlier this year indicates that conservatives love their porn. Turns out there’s not much difference in porn consumption in the various states of the USA . . . but that means red staters look at just as much porn as the heathens in the big coastal cities. And Utah, arguably the most conservative state we’ve got, was the leader, with about five and a half porno subscriptions per thousand broadband users. And that’s not counting the ones who watch the free stuff . . .
What’s so great about being wholesome, anyway?
This entry was posted on Wednesday, 17 June 2009 at 2:28 pm and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
on Friday, 17 July 2009 at 8:41 pm Chris wrote:
Hey, now! It *is* possible to be a self-described political conservative and not have a problem with pornography, you know - there are traditionalist biblical social conservatives, and there are small-government libertarian-themed conservatives, and twelve other flavors.