The Blowfish Blog

[Caught in the Net] Unlikely Places

You can find smut in the most unexpected places — provided you have a properly smutty turn of mind, that is.

Apparely the folks at Britain’s Office of Government Commerce don’t have their minds in the gutter, though, because their new logo is . . . causing some comment among people with more impure thoughts. The image reproduced at the top of this column, and if it doesn’t look too strange to you, just rotate it ninety degrees clockwise in your mind — yep, that’s right, there you go, looks like a guy with a nice grip on his, ah, joystick, doesn’t it? When this fact was pointed out — repeatedly, and emphatically, in the British press — the office took it well. Rather than changing the logo, they merely commented that, “It is true that it caused a few titters among some staff when viewed on its side, but on consideration we concluded that the effect was generic to the particular combination of the letters ‘OGC’ — and is not inappropriate to an organisation that’s looking to have a firm grip on government spend!” I wish the American government had such a good sense of humor (I mean, humour) . . .

Fortune cookies, of course, are a traditional source of sexual comedy, with the venerable trick of adding “in bed” at the end of each fortune for hilarious results. Like: “A thrilling time is in your immediate future . . . IN BED!” Or ” As the purse is emptied the heart is filled . . . IN BED!” But webcomic XKCD proposed the rather more interesting game of appending fortunes with the words “except in bed,” — which is, indeed, both funnier and more sad. “The ones you love will never let you down . . .” Well, you see where that’s going.

I actually see a fair number of giant inflatable things in my day-to-day life — at the local Farmer’s Market every weekend there’s usually some kind of giant inflatable castle, or shark, or dinosaur, or whatever in the form of a bounce house or big slide for the kiddies. But I’ve never seen an enormous inflatable terrifying vagina before. Apparently I don’t go to enough avant-garde theater in the Netherlands. Fortunately, the internet can bring giant scary inflated genitalia right into your home!

Finally, Eros Blog turned up a vintage advertisement for, well, a fur-lined keyhole — and that’s not even a euphemism for anything! Yes, it’s a genuine mink keyhole cover, helpfully illustrated, complete with a key plunging in to unlock what are (presumably) the gates of untrimmed paradise. Who says those were simpler times?

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, 28 May 2008 at 12:00 am and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.