Caught in the Net: Childish Things
The good book says it, y’all: “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” But some of us don’t really bother with the whole putting-away part . . . we just make certain adjustments, and suddenly childish things can seem a whole lot more adult. Cases in point:
You gotta give it to the Japanese when it comes to fetishes: their culture is endlessly inventive. For instance, crush videos are a modestly popular niche in America, where women (often barefoot, though sometimes clad in boots or high heels) smush things with their feet, from grapes to eggs to bugs to dead fish. But in Japan? They make videos where hot models crush model trains beneath their heels. (This probably ties nicely into the Giantess fetish, too.) Choo choo!
Remember Care Bears? (If you’re roughly my age, I bet you do.) Those adorable snuggly bears from the land of Care-a-lot have headed for Southern California to co-star in rough strap-on porn videos with cute blondes.. (The bear in question is Cheer Bear, if you’re curious, which means this is lesbian strap-on Care Bear porn.) I think I just felt the last of my innocence dry up and blow away on a hot Santa Ana wind. I really hope they tossed that stuffed toy into the wash afteward . . .
What toys are more iconic than Barbie and her dick of a boyfriend Ken? I know lots of people who, in their youth, spent an unhealthy amount of time stripping Ken and Barbie naked and scrutinizing their crotches for some sign of vestigial genitalia. Thus, I was unsurprised to encounter this nicely done music video of the dolls getting it on. The Barbie blowjob is especially impressive, though I find the milk bath bit at the end strangely off-putting. (At least . . . I hope that’s a milk bath.)
I tried, but failed, to find porn involving dessert-themed cartoon heroine Strawberry Shortcake. It seems like there should be something of the sort out there; she always struck me as such a little tart. (Ba-dum-chi!)
This entry was posted on Wednesday, 26 September 2007 at 12:00 am and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
on Wednesday, 26 September 2007 at 8:11 pm John Evans wrote:
First: Rule 34. “There is porn of it; No exceptions.”
Second: Strawberry Shortcake and Penny Arcade. The image was up on Penny Arcade for a while, but they had to take it down. You can Google for more text about it and more hi-res copies of the image.