The Blowfish Blog

Caught in the Net: A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper Is Vegan

The title of this entry is, of course, a reference to the viciously funny song “A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper Is Crying”, by the Bloodhound Gang. I always thought it would be hilarious to see a stripper do a routine to that song, so I was delighted to see the webcomic Something Positive make the same joke in a recent storyline about visiting a strip club. But I digress. (Except I suppose you can’t digress before you’ve actually gotten started.) What I meant to say is: Hey, there’s a vegan strip club in Portland OR! Casa Diablo replaced the meat dishes with soy and the leather garments with pleather. Is it a reflection of the owner’s deep commitment to vegetarian values, or just a publicity stunt? (If it’s the latter, it worked — I had several news stories about the club bookmarked, and only picked the NY Times story because they had the dopiest headline, “The Carrot Some Vegans Deplore”.)

Those stories got me thinking, naturally, about strip clubs, and how to find the good ones. I grew up in the rural south, where occasionally from the interstate you’d see an old barn transformed into a “gentleman’s club,” often with a giant XXX painted on an old silo. I never frequented such establishments — or even infrequented them, as they looked scary — but if only I’d had the internet back then . . . Why, I could have consulted Nudar.com, described as “GPS for Strip Clubs & Nudity,” and found the full extent of my options. It’s an interactive map with reviews and ratings for the US and Canada, covering strip clubs, bikini bars, nude beaches, and etc. Road trip!

If you’re in the Los Angeles area, you might try Gridskipper’s list of classy clubs in downtown LA. Or, if you’re feeling international, take a wad of American money down to Chile, where the owner of strip bar Passaponga has turned back the clock to 2004 . . . at least in terms of the exchange rate. As you’ve probably heard, the dollar is tanking in value worldwide, and in Chile a buck is only worth 430 pesos . . . except at Passaponga, where they’ll give you 600 pesos for a dollar, just like they did in 2004. Sounds like a good deal, but wouldn’t shoving 1200 pesos into a stripper’s g-string get a little bit unwieldy?

Share This

This entry was posted on Wednesday, 2 April 2008 at 12:00 pm and is filed under Caught in the Net. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.